The forbidden mark of rebellion

Steig Larsson's Millenium trilogy had done something to me. It was disturbing enough to read about how a girl is abused by the system and the society; but all through the 3 books, what caught my attention was the description of her tattoos. She gets a tattoo every time she undergoes unspeakable torture or crime. She keeps it as a memento.. a memento to painful memories. It was intrigued me as to why would someone do that.Why would anyone want to have a visible mark on their bodies to remind them of the pain they had been through. May be a tattoo is a symbol of survival.. surviving pain and trauma and yet making it in life. Lisabeth Salander did make me wanna get a tattoo, but my reasons were just different.

I was having a chat with my dearest friend when the topic about tattoos came up. She said she wanted to get one but somehow people think people with tattoos are rebels or unprofessional. I joked about my granny having one, and the only rebellion she ever led was with her 5 children who got on her nerves. 

But on a serious note, tattoos are considered as a mark of rebellion these days. Youngsters might consider it hip and cool but elders and the society look down on it, especially a large one with an intricate design on the visible part of the body. Youngsters who need to feel one among the "cool crowd" think tattoos are unavoidable.It is indeed a rage among youngsters. The Bollywood actor Saif Ali Khan was all over the media for tattooing his girl friend Kareena Kapoor's name on his hand. I wonder if the Tollywood actress Nayanthara regret going in a for a permanent tattoo of her then boyfriend/husband and currently her ex, Prabhu Deva's name on her hand.

The word tattoo is said to has two major derivations- from the polynesian word ‘ta’ which means striking something and the tahitian word ‘tatau’ which means ‘to mark something’. The history of tattoo began over 5000 years ago and is as diverse as the people who wear them. for a long time, tattooing was the preserve of sailors and criminals! Sailors used their body as a journal, to remember where the have been in their lifetime. Each mark or tattoo had a memory behind it. In prison, the tattoo - professionally done and homemade- indelibly imprint on their bodies what these men desire in their souls: autonomy and identity. The ultimate symbol for gang members are their gang tattoos, getting a permanent mark is a sign of showing total commitment to the gang. These tattoos can reveal lots of things, like, who you are/what gang you're in/ what your beliefs are, what you have done, where you have been, how many years you have been in jail (also referred to as ‘dead time’) and even things like how many you have killed. Known symbols include teardrops under the eye as well as spider webs on the elbows to symbolize people killed. I believe in the west, tattoos were used as a sign of affiliation among street gangs and as a badge of honour among ex-convicts. The more popular media like movies show bikers as badass guys having tattoos all over their arms and probably over the upper part of their bodies but many a times hands and legs are no exception. 

Though Hinduism has a liberal attitude towards tattooing, Islam & Judaism are against permanent tattooing. Christianity does not seem to have a consistent view on it other than the fact that The Bible says "You must not slash your body for a dead person or incise a tattoo on yourself." (Leviticus 19.28) but it is a practice among Christians to get a tattoo of the cross with the year, when on a pilgrimage. Body art or body piercing were not popular in the west in the early days and by early days I mean centuries back & when someone had to show rebellion, they would do something which is forbidden. Bible always condemned rebellion and compared it to witchcraft which was punishable by death. Witches were stoned to death many a times. Since body art was not considered mainstream in the west, the tattoos were considered as open rebellion. Moreover they were thought to be deviant. Some armies and tribes used tattoos to mark their deserters and hence it was known as a mark of disgrace. Studies in the 1970s have linked tattoos to homosexuality, gross sexual perversion, personality disorders and psychotic conditions.

A Hindu bride with henna tattoo! I wish she hadn't worn those ugly looking red slippers though!

I believe probably Hinduism is the only religion not against tattooing especially the permanent ones. Even our weddings especially the north Indian weddings are incomplete without the mehendi ceremony, which indeed is a temporary tattooing. Though south Indians do not have a particular ceremony other than for Muslims, henna tattooing is considered almost a must before all weddings. Like I mentioned earlier, my maternal grandmother had a tattoo of Om on her arms. But unlike the black or the colourful tattoos, it was a green one. And tattooing in those days in our language was called Pachakuthal, which literally means stamping in green. Every elderly person who had a tattoo was in green colour ink. Reminds me of Ford saying, You could have any colour as long as it is Black. Guess whoever did the tattooing those days, probably the tattoo association said the same thing about green.

In India, a stone sculpture of  Sanga period has tattoo marks on cheeks and chins. Decorating the body with mehandi or mixture of fragrant musk, saffron and sandal paste was very popular in ancient India, but it was temporary. Body art was mainly used to identify with the religious sect.Shaivaites, the devotees of Lord Shiva, used the horizontal marks with vibhudi while the Vaishnavaites, the devotees of Lord Vishnu, used the 3 vertical lines for body art. Tattooing was permanent which one carried to graveyard with them. The tattoos have religious and superstitious significance as well. Women preferred tattooing for the welfare of husband, children etc. Some got to fulfill a vow or against dreaded diseases. But by and large it was to ensure non-widowhood. Cheeks, brows, neck, arms, shoulders, and wrists are the favored parts. Men get tattoos on arms, shoulders and wrists to ensure virility. Among tribals it is a practice to get their entire body tattooed which enabled their bodies to camouflage with forest surroundings: The color of tattoo in India is green or dark green. Pricking the earmarked place with needles and then filling the pricks in holes with indelible ink (mainly prepared from herbs and carbon) forms the main process. Many castes in India do the job for petty payment even on the road side. Songs are sung, jokes are told while the pricking agony is born by the person for an hour or more depending on the intricacy of design. The designs could be of snakes, birds (peacock, Garuda, etc.), chariot, sun, moon, trees, flowers, and grains. Tattooing is believed to protect persons against attack of wild beasts and snake bite--hence the use of respective designs.

Okay, enough of history and geography! I was trying to figure out why is tattooing considered rebellious. I need to go off the course again.. but lets hope I would make a point.

You been to any of those old Hindu temples and seen those architecture with all half naked or completely nude ladies and men hugging and doing whatever they want...( I mean.. in the sculpture.. Don't go overboard thinking, you missed the chance! ) So, India is the land of Kamasutra, the original sex book.. oops... that was supposed to be in all hushed tones... let not anyone hear it.. especially the mother-in-law of the sister's nephew's friend's uncle's daughter's brother's aunt whose nephew might be a future prospect of mine!! Whatever happened to celebrating one's sexuality. People think Kamasutra is probably about those sex positions which would be Yoga practitioners cringe.. nope.. it is also about how a man should treat a woman... his dasis... and a whole lot of other stuff. I will tell you what stuff when I have the patience to read it. So, in a country where sexuality was openly celebrated, why is everything about sex in hushed voices.. said behind closed doors in dark rooms? Where did the taboo come from? If you thought, I knew.. my dear friend, I have no clue. You should ask those pseudomoralists who roam on the street making sure even kindergarden boys and girls do not hold their hands.

Yeah! So, in a country where body art with ink was appreciated, they now find tattooing absurd and rebellious. What went wrong? When Britishers left, they probably took away a lot of tolerance and open mindedness from us. Is that what I really think? I have no clue what I really think. But it is nice to have someone to put the blame on, always!! So you Britishers... you are at fault for everything that is wrong in my country today... from crows doing their business on Gandhi's statues.. to the... potholes in the National Highways.. to guys growing their hair longer than the girls to girls getting tattooing done on places no mom would wanna hear of.

 

To an extend, tattoos does reflect one's sense of self and identity. Centuries before the age of  rock stars and the celebrities, tattoos were used by tribals to mark their territory and for identifying oneself to a particular sect. Some tribes like the apatani in Arunachal Pradesh used to tattoo on their women's face to make them ugly so that the neigbouring Nishi tribe would not abduct their pretty women. This continued till the Government banned it in the 1970s. Pretty weird, huh!

 

A apatani woman with facial tattoo & nose plugs. Seems the men did succeed in their mission ;)

Gone are the biblical days, and globalization and modernization may have made tattoos more acceptable and even cool but tattooing arises health concerns also. There is a high risk of Hepatitis B & C being contracted through tattooing parlours in unhygienic conditions. AIDS is considered to be contracted the same way. Underneath the seemingly harmless tattoo, there lies a risk of acquiring deadly blood borne diseases which could result in fatality. They can even cause unpleasant skin conditions and disorders. There were cases of flesh eating bacteria also. Some parlours and prisoners use iron oxide in the ink and that causes a high risk when undergoing an MRI. So unless you are willing to take all this risk, you should think twice before getting a tattoo.

Soccer ace David Beckam flaunting hiss tattoos

With the modernisation and urbanisation over the decades, the tattoo culture has shifted significantly. Be it from the movies or sports, celebrities love flaunting their tattoos. The traditional patterns may have been replaced by modern motifs, but the meaning behind the pain-inducing practice hasn't changed much. Tattoos are still considered as a sign of strength, courage, and virility, because of the pain associated with it. Now, more than ever, tattoo is a fashion statement and the ultimate body art. I would have to agree with who ever said," Your body is a temple, but how long can you live in the same house before you redecorate?"  

Image Source Courtesy : Pic01;
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Pic3, Pic4 , Pic5 , Pic6 , Pic7 , Pic8 , Pic9 , Pic10  
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Info Credits : Wikipedia, Terry Watkins, TOI, DB, KP

Idea courtesy : AGRA

The shades of Pink

My brother had come home for a short vacation. I had been looking forward to it for some time and was excited to have him back. It was time for fun again compared to the dull and boring days I had been having.  This time he had brought along a gift. He handed over a small package.. gave a bright smile and while I was busy peeling away the cover, he said.. “Welcome to the apple family”. There... in that li’l package, it was an ipod… a pink one.. a bright pink one.. a shocking(or whatever them girls call it) pink ipod!!  I had wanted an ipod for long and was excited to have one in my hand.. but a pink one? As if understanding my confusions, he stood there smiling and explained what had happened in the store. He had actually chosen a black one as he knew black was my, nope, our favourite colour. And then walks in the sale girl flashing the brightest smile and probably wearing a lot more bright lipstick! No, he didn’t tell me that, I just cooked up that part; a sales girl obviously would have a bright smile and even brighter lipstick. How else is she supposed to sell these costly stuff? She should have left him as he had already selected. But would she? No way! We women have to poke our nose into everything and so she asked him if it was for his girl friend and when he said nope, my sister, she readily hands him the pink one. She says, girls dig pink! So he bought the pink one. Seeing the look on my face, he tells me.. it is just to remind you that you too are a girl.. something which you keep forgetting! Now what was that all about!! Even though the kolaveri song was not released back then, I am sure thats what I sung in my mind that moment.

Anyways, lets get back to the main issue here... girls dig pink? Seriously? Well, who am I kidding, girls do dig pink.. but why.. but the whys? 

You rarely find a guy who thinks pink is manly. Ask any guy and with a smir kon his face, he would say pink is for girls. Though I do remember Saif Ali Khan and Hrithik Roshan wearing pink and were able to carry it without any damage to their masculinity; I wish I could say the same thing about Abhishek Bachchan driving that pink car wearing that floral shirt and a muffler (is that what you call that stuff he wraps around his neck?) in Dostana.  His stubble was the only manly thing about him in that whole getup. I have a thing for stubble these days.. men kinda look sexy with it, don't you think? ..Well, I am just blabbering, ignore!

If you give it a serious thought, you actually find that pink dwells so deep in our lives and popular culture. I could put bullet points to point them out, but lets just do it the normal way. Remember those pinky promises li'l girls used to swear to keep secrets for each other; I don't remember making one though. I have heard it from my friends.. Oh wait.. it is the same thing you make with crossing your little finger with your friend's right? I hope that is pinky promise; though it has nothing to do with the pink colour as such, it stands for eternal friendship. Please feel free to tell me if I am wrong; which usually I am when it comes to girlie stuff. No hard feelings,eh!!

 If you take music, there is a PinkPop festival in Netherlands which goes on for 3 days. According to Wikipedia, the name is half Dutch, half English, in two possible combinations. Originally, 'pink' comes from the Dutch word for Pentecost, 'Pinksteren' and 'pop' comes from pop music (or 'popular music'). But a later creative interpretation for the name, is a combination of the English word pink and the Dutch word 'pop', which means doll, which is the origin for the logo, a doll in a pink dress.

There again is a P!nk, the pop diva. Alecia Beth is better known by her stage name, Pink. Pink had dyed her hair pink in the beginning of her career(or was it later, I don't know. I have seen her with pink hair though). Though I haven't heard most of her songs Fuckin' Perfect is an absolute favourite of mine.

And for the rock fanatics, you have the Pink Floyd, the psychedelic rock band. Though they didn't dye their pink or wore pink suits to the concert, I believe they were one of the most successful and influential bands of all times; so successful that even Facebook borrowed "The Wall". Okay! Bad Joke! But Pink Floyd is something you can enjoy with some marijuana; if that is legal where you stay. Now don't blame me if you are caught smoking a pot listening to Pink Floyd.

 

When you talk about pink, how can you miss the ever famous for her PR, Mrs Aishwarya Rai Bachchan and her pink panther movies. I don't know what part she plays in the movie but her PR guy did make sure that the Indians feel that she was only one who was offered a Hollywood movie ever. Then there is the pink panther, the comic. I have nothing to tell you about it, other than the fact that I have no clue what that is.

Then you have those paint companies which give atrocious names to their paint. I recently saw their shade cards and there were at least 20-30 different shades of pink alone. From baby blanket to ashes of rose...first blush to soft serenade.. I mean who names paints this way! Height of perverted creativity. I do not blame the paint companies alone, its the same with the cosmetics companies also. Looking at the eyeshadow range, lipstick or anything other colourful stuff they offer, turns me insane. So now you know why I stay away from makeup. I had wanted to paint my room couple of days back and when it came to deciding the colour from the colour shade they provide you at the store, I got so confused that I decided to drop the whole painting idea. 

Then there is a pink attached to a noble cause... the pink ribbon. The noble pink ribbon stands for the breast cancer. Though there are couple of other ribbons, I guess this one is more famous. May be because of all the breast cancer awareness going on in Facebook with all women putting up the colour of their undies and where they like to do it so as to make men more curious about breast cancer and bring awareness to men. As far as I know men, they are sure interested in breast cancer, it is just that , they bother only about the first part of it. While we are at it, lets not forget the whole range of lingerie of PINK by Victoria Secret and other designers. Shades of pink & red are never out of style when it comes to lingerie.

Now that we are talking about illness, may be we could talk about health too. Remember those times when you wrote those snail mails.. A typical starting would be something like this "May this letter find you in the pink of health". Gone is the era of snail mails and the usage of  "in the pink".

As sweet and mellow pink might seem, sometimes it could get you scared too. It did scare quite a lot of people when recession hit in recent times. You do know what I am talking about, right? Yeah! The pink slips!! Once you get them, you are fired and life is screwed.

From childhood girls are dressed in pink and guys in blue. Seems like girls are almost forced to like pink from infancy. But is that the case in real? No says the scientists. It is innate in women to choose pink over blue shades. Who would have thought that scientists really didn't have anything better to do. According to a Time article, women are hard-wired that way or so says  a study conducted on 206 participants. Weird, isn't it?

Every colour denotes something like red for passion or danger, black for mourning or elegance, white for peace. In the same way, pink stands for delicateness and sereneness. It could imply playfulness, femininity and regardless the gender it is associated with, people believe pink promotes love. Doesn't matter what anybody says, girls, we know pink is here to stay!!

Image Source Courtesy : Pic1, Pic2, Pic3, Pic4, Pic5, Pic6, Pic7, Pic8, Pic9

Idea Courtesy : AGRA

The birds & the bees talk

Okay Kiddos, fun time ends here. We are probably (well, a faithful reader would know I could never stick to one topic) going to discuss adult topics.. So buzz away. I wish I had one of those big boring confirm buttons which they have on various sites asking you to confirm that you are 18 else to leave the site immediately. Which moron did actually think that a 15 year old can’t press the confirm button or does it require any special skill that one would acquire when one turns 18. Its almost a decade since I turned 18 and sadly, I do not remember acquiring any special skills of turning 18, 21 or for that matter 25.

But then I know I have only one reader for this blog and I really do not want to buzz that one away. So despite me thinking that you are a kid, you might as well stay and read on.

Coming to the title of the post,  I have never had this whole birds & bees talk with anyone; none elder, no one younger… well, I mean the bird & the bees version of course. But why do they call it the birds& bees talk? I have never seen a bird or a bee do it. But I am sure every 5 year old would have seen a dog do it. Shouldn’t they be calling the dog talk or something? Talk about irony.  I remember this old biology professor of mine saying, “How come Hornbill (vezhambal) gets to be the state bird of Kerala, have any one of ever seen it in real? Crow should be our state bird!” I couldn’t agree more.

  

A dearest friend of mine posed the question “why do  men want to commit to one girl when he just wants to cheat on...he might as well stay as a Casanova” which she picked up on the Oprah Show and wanted me to blog about when I told her I have nothing to write about. Isn’t the answer simple enough? Free maid to take care of the house and to make it a home.. Free lady to mother and bring up his kids and the one on the top.. Free sex. Men are the ones who jump at anything free and they blame us women for getting excited about the sales weekends and discounts. Grade one Hypocrites!! O yeah, one with a capital h! ;)

C’mon you can’t blame them. It is easier to be married than to be alone in the big jungle out there when mamma won’t be there to take care of them anymore. I am sure you would have heard of the “proverb”; if your man is not horny; then make him a sandwich. So its either hungry or horny. Now you know the ‘h’ I was talking about. Oh yeah, then there those occasional sports mania he needs to take care of. Well, let’s just ignore them bitching about how bad their wives treat them just ‘cos he didn’t take the trash out while she manages the job, the home and the kids.

Back in college, we had this chapter three on marriage. Oh yeah! I even remember the chapter number. And our professor happened to be someone who had a lot of middle names.. like the popular joke.. My name is Rao, Venkata Rao.. Vigneshwara Venkata Rao……… Vishveshwara(17 middle names and then some)Venkata Rao.Evrytime he sees the Keralite girls in the class, he would start ... Kerala has a matriarchal system, isn't it so? I would always want to scream, No, You idiot! Some site says ezhava caste are the largest Hindu community in Kerala. Big time MCPs they are and would they believe in matriarchal system? No way!! Though a larger part of some other castes are into matriarchal system and prefer peaceful living but it is almost non-existent these days. Sometimes I feel "mallu guys" is just another term for MCPs. ;)

I recently read a book titled “Committed” by Elizabeth Gilbert, a sequel to her previous best seller, Eat Pray & Love. The author explores the concept of marriage in different countries by reading and going to couple of places and talking to the natives. She describes  gender fairness in marriages as "Marriages based on a traditional, restrictive sense about a woman's place in the home tend to be less strong and less happy than marriages where the man and the woman regard each other as equals, and where the husband participates in more traditionally female and thankless household chores. All I can say on this matter is that I once overheard Felipe telling a house-guest that he has always believed a woman's place is in the kitchen...sitting in a comfortable chair, with her feet up, drinking a glass of wine and watching her husband cook dinner. Can I get a few bonus points on this one?"

Well lady, As much as I wanna go all awww… how sweet Felipe is; but don’t you think that man has played his cards rather too well? I am sure you made it up to him between the sheets that day!! Men know our psyche too well and know how to play it well. They just spread those nonsense rumours “women are so complicated”, “even God doesn’t know what a woman wants” blah blah blah. And we remain blissfully ignorant!! I am no bra-burning feminist but I do think we women, at least a vast majority of us, are dumb emotional fools who fall for that “eternal love stories” and hoping to find one for ourselves. We are always told that we are incomplete in ourselves and that perfect one will make us complete. And we keep waiting for our other/better halves to come and make it a complete circle or perfect zero whatever you think suits the best.I would like to believe that unlike the uncooked pizza dough, I am more of a pizza base with basic cheese but waiting for the more interesting toppings. ..complete in myself and my partner would complement me. Well, compliments from him are also welcome. ;) Yes, I did chose to ignore that  comparisons get bizarre at times. ;)

 I believe the most marketed concept ever on the face on earth is true love. You have stories of true love everywhere in the world.. Romeo - Juliet to Heer-   Ranja. Every guy and girl dreams about that soul mate you want spend the rest of your lives with( But a li’l reading on the subject made it clear to me that one could have 127 soul mates and one among them could be your twin soul. Complicated, ain’t it? ). Into your teens, you are made to think (by the media of course) that every li’l crush is true love or one step towards your true love.And once you find him/her you hope to grow old together till all your tooth fall, bones break and lose control over your bladder and still happy to wake up next to each other. What rubbish!



The people have a harmless notion that someday you will meet your “The One”, get married and happily live ever after.  You need a valentine’s day and exquisite chocolates, costly gifts and extra costly hallmark cards and a huge bouquet of red bud roses which can cost you a lot, to let someone know that you love them till eternity. So unless you are sort of a rich guy, celebrating VDay can be injurious to your bank account. Oops, I didn’t mean to bitch about how expensive having a girl friend could be.  ;)But you get my point. From childhood you are led to believe that your prince charming will ride on that white horse and will fight the whole wide world to keep you safe blah blah blah. We like idiots believe all that and when there is no horse, no prince let alone charming; we end up disappointed. I honestly believe love or specifically romantic love is overrated.

A simple google search about arranged marriages led to me a young girl's (all of 24 years of age) blog and let me quote her "I know what I wanna do and I am proceeding towards my Goal. But I miss having that one special person to share this with. For how long am I going to keep making plans with my friends and their respective partners. I miss having a "Him" around, I want a him around when I've had a good day at work, I want a him around when i've worked out that extra mile just to lose wtg fast, I want a him around when I am PMSing, I want a him around when I've fought with my mum, I want a him around to go for movies and dinners with, I want a him around who I can be proud of, of every achievement in his life." I hope she finds her guy who is able to rise up to her expectations. See what our movies, books, poems, greeting cards and the rest have led to. You always need a special someone to look forward to.. and if the guy she finds needs his personal space and she is not able to appreciate it, there is gonna be a lot of disappointment. So, sweetie, I wish you luck.


 I did get sidetracked a little right. No issues, we can plunge right back into it. So is it only men who benefit from marriage? Not really!! A lot of women do too. Lets go with the cliché, some marry for love hoping to find their raison d’être, some marry for money, some for prestige and god knows what all justifiable and so called practical reasons.

And some day I hope my “Prince Charming” comes on his horse to sweep my feet away. All I hope is that once he sweeps me off my feet, he is healthy enough to carry  me. I already have a bad back and can’t risk it once again. When people ask me where my prince charming is, I always tell them that he lost his way and is adamant about not asking for directions; the MCP that he is ;) And he is gonna be late especially if he has found a horse like this one below!

You might call me a cynic, but I am just another stupid girl who hopes to find my perfect guy some day. After all they say there is no such thing as a perfect guy, but there is one guy who would be perfect for you! :)

Image Source Courtesy : Pic1, Pic2, Pic3, Pic4, Pic5, Pic6, Pic7, Pic8, Pic9, Pic10, Pic11, Pic12
I do not own any of the images used and they belong to the sources listed above.

When Harry met Sally or was it...

It was the early hours of dawn... He was awake but dreamy... He was dreaming about her... how it would be to hold her close to him.. to smell her hair.. to look at her angelic yet naughty eyes and whisper some sweet-nothings into her ears... he looked outside to see the stars.. they always reminded him of her... and yet again he was feeling close to her... he could smell her exotic fragrance... he was confused.. he had to make sure.. he looked again... yes.. it was her... that unmistakeable white silhouette near the fence .. he was more than happy to see her.. the white beauty!!

But as fate would play the cruel joke every time it wanted to have fun, there comes the villain in the love story! The white beauty saw the villain before any harm was done and ran for her life mumbling away promises to come back to him when it was safe enough. He cursed his fate but he couldn't show any of that irritation now. It was his master and he had to wag his tail pretending to be all happy. So he did just that!

Okay wait!! wag his tail?? You mean tail, like the one hanging at the backside?? Really? What the...

Chill chill... It wasn't my dream.. nor my boyfriend's(okay! that one exists only in my head and not on the real earth!!) So, whose was it? It was Candy's. Candy? Huh? Candy... my dog!! I am no expert on the canine dream analysis but my dog; my interpretation of his dreams, may be not really the Freudian way!! No... Don't gimme that look now!! What were you expecting? You were insane enough to actually read my blog... Your fault!! Oops... I mean.. you are extra nice.. Do come back to read my blog and blow your brain once a while! ;)



Okay, lets talk about the villain now. Any guesses? It was yours truly ... in her half-asleep-half-awake walk to let Candy out of his kennel when I saw that white mongrel bitch (wait, I am not swearing.. bitch, the female dog I mean) moaning softly and looking wistfully at Candy. Right outside the kennel, I find my dad's and mom's footwear; one each. Couldn't really figure out what I was seeing. Did dad wake up early to let Candy out and wore one of his and mom's footwear? Weird!! Whatever. I let Candy out and he drags me to the front door where all of our footwear are heaped together. Whats happening? By the time, I look around my Candy doll got all busy peeing on our footwear. Yewww! Marking the territory? I never got this marking territory by peeing. On second thoughts, is that why our men go pee on every wall they see on the road??

Anyways, before he actually did the peeing I was lucky enough to see when he was starting to do the acrobatics and lift his leg up and dragged him away before any 'stinking' damage was done. There were bite and nail marks on dad's and mom's footwear. Guess both the lovers didn't get anything else to play with. Argh!! And that was Day One. I was wondering how long the lovers had been meeting all chori chupe like in the good ole Bollywood movies.


Okay! Now even my dog has a girlfriend and I am still single. Do I get some cookies, bars of chocolate, tubs of ice cream, boxes of tissues and a shoulder to cry on? the broader the better! ;)

Day two :- As usual the somnambulist villain walks to the kennel. [Okay clarification time.. I am not a somnambulist, but yeah I can sleep anytime including when walking! ;) and btw, Day one, Day two doesn't mean consecutive days; just the days when things happen.] The lovers were probably whispering sweet nothings and passing some soft kisses when they saw me approach and the white beauty ran away, yet again. Heck! I didn't even get a chance to meet my bahu! Not that I had sported a pleasing look on my face. ;)

Day three:-  Yet again it was morning. How I hate waking up in the cold mornings and to miss the warmth of my bed. But I had promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep and miles to go before I sleep.. Oops.. got a li'l side tracked again. So I walked to the kennel and there they were! But this time, there was one more dog with brown and fawn coat standing next to the white beauty. They seemed to be in some serious discussion. She probably brought her brother/father/mother/sister to introduce to her man. Mr/Ms.BrownieFawn didn't seem to mind me walking towards them but white beauty ushered him/her and together they ran away  in different directions probably thinking I couldn't run behind both of them 'cos I am not skilled as Rajni Sir who could run in 100 directions at the same time. See, Rajni Sir has fans in the canine kingdom also. Mind it!



Day four :-Dad asked me to check if there were any letters in the mail box and the dutiful obedient daughter that I am, decide to check if anything was there in the mail box, for a change.And since I walk around extending my neck like a giraffe, I could see that white beauty was graciously resting in my neighbour's plot and our lovelorn hero yearning to catch a glimpse of love of his life. Suddenly white beauty shot a cautious look at me, got up and started sprinting. And there it was... something between her legs... oh boy.. no, it can't be... oh god, please don't let it be... but still there it was hanging in all its glory.. the balls!! What, my candy doll... my candy kunju is a gay dog?? Nahhiiiiiiiii... Ye nahi ho sakta... but the only thing I could do was to walk away singing "Mera da ladla bigad gaya"!!

Okay, time to clarify about the title. Well, you all know what "when Harry met Sally" means.. I just made it into when Harry met Sally or was it when Harry met Sala... You get it? Hahaha.. Bad Joke.. and definitely the biggest PJ of the year! It has been a while since I cracked my trademark PJs and didn't want to miss a chance to crack one! ;)

Day five :- Usually I & Candy  spend quite a lot of time together playing. Well, me playing and he tolerating me. But today, nope.. he didn't want to play along..he was missing his white beauty..  I could say that he longed to be with her.. oops.. him it is! My love sick puppy! Literally!

Day Six: Candy was at the gate. These days, the only thing he was interested was to look out for his white beauty and her friend/family who she brings along. Dad had given him a biscuit few minutes earlier and I wanted to check if he finished it. There again the white beauty and hiis friend/family was there at the gate. And I couldn't believe my eyes. My li'l candy doll had taken a small bit of the biscuit and had pushed the larger part of the biscuit so that his starving friends could have it. I had noticed that he leaves some food behind in his bowl these days and I thought he was not feeling well. But that moment, I realised that he had intentionally left the food behind so his starving friends who had no shelter or food could have it.

That day my dog taught me what me something that people having been throwing around just as an another word in various posts in Facebook and rarely bother showing it to fellow beings... Yes! That day my dog taught me humanity! :)

Image Sources :
Pic 1 , Pic 2 , Pic 3, Pic 4, Pic 5, Pic 6, Pic 7
None of the pics are mine. They are taken from the above sources.

The Spider induced philosophy!

There I was lying down on my bed staring at the celing. I would have liked to think I might solve some of the unresolved mysteries of the universe, simply by staring at that fan. Sadly, that never happens, does it ever?

So, as I was busy staring at the ceiling, there came that cute little spider from nowhere. Coming to think of it, that spider was not all that cute. You know, just spider-cute(now, don't give me that weird look!!). You might think, that spider inspired me in some way like the one inspired the King Robert. You don't remember that story? The King, the battle, the cave, the spider, the web... and the King goes back and fights his enemy to win the war. Yeah that one. So, back to the present; I was busy looking at the spider hoping it might inspire me in some way, at least to get back to the test preparations which I should have started aeons back. But what does it do? Heck!! It gets me thinking and thinking about... well, what was that about! Yeah! That how weird the language English is!! It seems full of gibberish. Before you think I have gone completely insane, let me explain. Well, promise you will stay with me till the end (Nope, I do not mean the end of the world but yeah, probably once you finish, it might be the end of you or me, if you know what I mean ;))

My mother tongue (how come there is no father tongue? 'Cos only a mother gets to speak? Weird!!) is Malayalam; which indeed is one of the sweetest languages I have ever known; bit nasal but sweet and sensible. Okie, Sensible? I'll tell you why. We call a spider an ettukaali which translates to an eight-legged thingie. So simple right and sensible of course. And how in the Heaven does the word "Spider" make any sense? English basically uses the root words and expands on it. What would the root word of Spider be then? Spi and Der? Means Spy and Der (which means Duh! I googled ;)) Which would means every spider is an alien spy!!

While I was busy thinking how would the alien spy be collecting information about us earthlings and passing it on the mother ship, there comes another alien spy (Okay!! I have got 2 spiders in my room.We co-exist, Big deal! ).So Alien.One was cautiously watching Alien.Two, probably with eyebrows raised and wondering, Hey what the heck are you doing on this side on the room; it is my territory. Seconds later,they were hugging. No..probably they were kissing and  making up. Oh! Alien.Two probably was Alien.One's girlfriend. Oh! I get it. Oh yes! They are dancing now in a way that reminds me of some Naga Dance; but holding all their eight hands (and legs??) together.

Oh No!! They seem to be wrestling now. Yeah! Just like John Cena and Umaga in the WWF. Alien.One was running away from Alien.Two in such a rush as if it were his wife and had caught him red handed doing something which she had said was an absolute NO- NO and was coming to hit him with a broom or a log. So, what is the moral of the story? Listen to what she blabbers and don't screw up it with your wife, you moron!! God!! What kind of an idiot can't comprehend that! Err!

Was I stoned while blogging this post? What do you think, I haven't been asking that myself? Nope, I am not insane. My mother had me tested!






Picture Sources :Universe, Spider Pic1 & Pic2.

Ramblings on a rainy night!

It is a pretty dark night. Okay! Nights are dark, I get it!! I am trying hard to scribble something and don't you give me that look now. It has been raining for a while. And as usual, it is making me hungry. And yes.. I crave for it... oh nothing big.. the same ole chayem parippuvadem. For the unenlightened, it is the famous combo of tea and well, how do I describe a parippuvada... lets see... it is a golden fried dumpling made out of lentils. Yeah, I know!! That description is pretty boring, ain't it? But trust me, the flavour is gonna beat you. Right now, I would need nothing more than a hot, steaming cup of tea and parippuvada...

My brother is going to have a tough time stopping his laughter, right after he reads the blog url. He has been making fun of me always and this time is not going to be an exception, I presume. But sadly enough, that thought is not enough to to make me stop this post right here. Well, he has another 49 treats pending and he has to get me nothing but chayem-parippuvadem. Illada, njan nannavilla (Nope my dear brother, I am never going to change for better! ;))

To me, somehow chaya and parippuvada (as it should be pronounced) stands for the simplicity of the life I have had. It reminds me of the childhood days; when it would be pouring down heavily in the evenings and amma (my mother) serve us with parippuvadas and steaming cup of tea. May be it is the nostalgia that makes it tasty. Wait a minute. Nostalgia making it tasty? Do I make sense? No, I know. Parippuvada is tasty 'cos it is tasty, silly!

Ask any fellow keralite, he could tell you that it is one of the best combos in the world, right after beefum porottem (beef with kerala parantha). Now please don't tell me you did not know "beefum porottem" was the national dish of Kerala. We, keralaites are like that. "SimBle" people who can eat anything edible. Most of us are born foodies. How do I know? 'Cos I am one! :-D

Well, talking about "simBle", there were times, when I never used to get the what the whole joke is about. When a unsuspecting-you are at the butt of the joke, it takes time to click. Okie, you can have the pleasure and honour of calling me a tubelight. But don't you think MTv took this way too seriously or was it VTv. Ohmy! on which one was that Lolakutty coming? Come to think of it, I used to like her spring rolls... I mean her hair... it was as if she had a million of springs attached to her head. I don't really remember understanding a lot of her jokes. It is more like the comedy circus that comes on Sony now. I understand it is a joke when Archana PuranSingh laughs or rather roars or whatever she is supposed to be doing.

They have reality comedy shows on television these days. I don't get the jokes of 99.99% of the comedy shows these days. Something wrong with them or has my sense of humour gone completely awry? Ha! Let us not talk about my sense of humour now. I have no more left. It is midnight, I should be sleeping and letting you live in peace. So I shall stop it here.



And yes, I still crave for that hot steaming cup of chayem parippuvadem! :)

Image Source courtesy : Flickr

P.S: The only saving grace of this post happens to be the photograph! Yeah, I know! *Shamelessly-grinning*